Or: Why I proudly strive to break racial stereotype.
[warning, this post contains graphic language]
If you’ve been following this blog for a while, then you know I’m a get-after-it kind of guy. Some examples of that:
- I play to win.
- I don’t take no for an answer.
- I like to get press & attention.
- I went out of my way to get rejected daily.
- I can do one hundred fucking pushups in a row.
- I run a blog called “The Art of Ass-Kicking“.
I also happen to be a Chinese-American immigrant: born on foreign soil and raised and naturalized in the US.
The attributes I described in the first paragraph run directly counter to our society’s conception of Asians – meek, quiet, humble people who are sexually non-threatening (this applies mainly to men), don’t cause any trouble, and do what they’re told.
Well I’m not interested in abiding by that bullshit.
Believe it or not, there was a time in my life when I was shy and quiet, primarily interested in books and got bullied / beat up after class. And I did bust my butt to get good grades and good SAT scores so I could attend a top university like Stanford.
But at some point I realized the lie that my Chinese mother (unknowingly) told me:
Working hard and doing well in school will get you a good job and make girls want to be with you.”
Perhaps that worked in China, but it doesn’t work here.
Turns out, being successful at work OR in romance requires you to make noise, take risks and be aggressive. These lessons and many others are ones I’m still learning and striving toward. It might be simpler to just keep my head down and my mouth shut, as I see many of the men of my father’s generation do, but I know that that strategy won’t help me retire early or ask out that cute girl I just met.
And I won’t accept that. Continue reading…